Her lips move, speaking words they do not hear…
Her words are lost in the crashing waves of their expectations, and their entanglement in their own thoughts… those tangled ropes of what she and others must REALLY be thinking and feeling. Afraid to reach out for answers, they wrap themselves tighter in those ropes of expectations and are dragged farther away, weighed by the anchor they choose to hang on to… drawn and pulled deeper into the dark depths.
Battered by the waves, her feet touch ground for a moment, she speaks her heart – hoping to cut through the entanglement. Her heart cries, “I love you! Do you love me, too?” Her words and actions have consistently taught her children love and honor, she watches them honor others, but they do not hear the unspoken cry, “please, love me too.”
As she chokes and gasps under the force of another brutal wave, she considers again, the futility of her voice…
“They do not hear me…
my words are just whispers in the wind…
They hear the angry waves, the demands of angry voices, they hear their own wants, but my words fall like a grain of sand – lost in the bottom of the ocean amongst so many other grains.”
As she contemplates the silence, and considers closing her mouth for the last time… letting the force of the waves carry her away, her toe brushes against something… She dives to the bottom to discover a clam, with a rare pearl. She runs her finger over the precious pearl and realizes that it is those tiny grains of sand, that appear so insignificant, that produce the precious pearl.
She is weary, and frustrated by the fury of the waves, the fury of the storm, but deep under the water, she experiences a moment of peace. She gathers strength to swim towards the light — towards the shore.
The storm still rages,
Her words still fall on unhearing ears…
But as she focuses on the light ahead, she gathers strength from the storm and swims with the rhythm of the waves… she no longer fears the dark… her cries have been heard, by the light that draws in the weak and the weary… by the one who sees, hears, loves and promises strength and rest.
Others cannot love or give like He gives… and those she loves are too entangled in the bonds of desires and expectations to be free to hear her, to know her, to love her… She sees and prays for their battles… but also sees that it is not her words or her heart that encumbers them… they are chasing after fruitless desires and hopeless love – a fantasy – while trampling over real love and true hope… She grasps the pearl of wisdom, the pearl of life, hope and love… Her hearts longs to share it with them, but their hearts are closed tightly still. Her words still fall to the bottom, like grains of sand… but now she sees beds of pearls forming that they will harvest for themselves when their hearts are ready.